Quiz Madness
by froggyparty96
Summary: Each chapter will be me asking different groups of people -marauders,death eaters,etc.- funny,random questions.Please read and review and give me suggestions of questions to use!
1. Marauders

_***PLEASE READ!* I'll be posting more chapters, and each chapter about a different group of people, so keep checking in. Please review and put questions that you would like me to use! I could use some help! Oh yeah, and sorry nearly all the questions are making fun of Peter. I just don't like him.**_

Quiz Madness-The Marauders

"Hello everybody,I'm Sirius,or Padfoot"

"I'm James!"

"I'm Peter."

"And I'm Remus."

"Today,Prongs,Wormtail,Moony and I will be answering questions for this quizy thingy,so here goes."

**Question 1:**

**What would you name your child if you had one?**

_James: _*Misty eyed* Whatever Lily wants...

_Remus:_ Well,what would your choice be?

_James: _If it was a girl,I'd probably want to name her something like...Rose....or Daisy....or Lavendar....

_Sirius:_ And if it's a boy?

_James: _Something cool.....like Adric! Or Hal!

_Peter: _What about Harry? I have a great uncle Harry,he's awesome!

_James: _Harry....hmmmm....nah.

**Question 2:**

**If you were a cookie,what kind would you be?**

_Sirius: _SNICKERDOODLE! I LOVE SNICKERDOODLES!!!!

_James: _What about you,Wormtail?

_Peter:_ Umm....a sugar cookie,maybe?

_James: _Why?

_Sirius:_ YEAH,WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE A SNICKERDOODLE,TOO?!?!

_Peter:_ ...Snickerdoodles give me gas...

**Question 3:**

**What is your favorite animal?**

_James: _Stag.

_Sirius: _Dog.

_Peter:_ Bunny.

_James,Sirius,Remus: _.......

**Question 4:**

**What's your favorite outfit?**

_James:_ My quidditch uniform!

_Remus:_ Yes,James,because you know how sexy i think your quidditch uniform is.

_Sirius: _QUIDDITCH PLAYING WEREWOLF BABIES!!!!

_Remus:_ *Sigh*

**Question 5:**

**Would you rather make out with a muggle or lick Snape's armpit?**

_Remus:_ Well we all know Sirius's answer would be.

_Sirius:_ Yeah,of course I would-

_James,Remus,Peter:_ LICK SNAPE'S ARMPIT!!!!!!!!!

**Question 6:**

**What's your favorite school subject?**

_Sirius:_ Snogging 101! I met this girl yesterday and-

_Remus:_ Please spare us the details. Anyway,my favorite subject is Defense Against the Dark Arts. Or potions.

_Sirius:_ You just say potions because Slughorn _fancies_ you!

_Remus: _Well at least I don't snog him in a broom closet every night at 6:00 sharp!

_Sirius:_ How do i know you don't?!

James: Guys,could you please stop the argument here? Got some seriously terrible mental images running through my head right now!

**Question 7:**

**Do you like s'mores?**

_James:_ Love 'em.

_Sirius: _Will you share your s'mores with me,Jamsie?

_James:_ Hmm let me think about that-no.

_Sirius: _THEN WE DUEL!

_James: _TO THE DEATH!

_James,Sirius:_ *Pull out swords*

**Question 8:**

**She sells sea shells by the sea shore.**

_Remus: _That's not a question.

_James:_ I wonder if Lily likes sea shells...

_Sirius:_ I can't even say that!

_Peter: _Why does she sell them on the sea shore if you could just pick them up?

_Remus,James,Sirius:_ .....

**Question 9:**

**i think this quiz is over,is that okay with you guys?**

_James:_ Hey look,there's Lily!

_Remus: _This was a very intriuging expirience,and just for the record,I HAVE NEVER SNOGGED SLUGHORN AND NEVER WILL.

_Sirius: _Never snogged anyone,more like it....

_Peter:_ Shoes...shoes....shoes....let's get some shoes.....

_***PLEASE READ!*In number 9, the shoes thing is from a youtube video. In number one, if you didn't notice, all the girls' names James suggested were flowers, like "Lily". Hope you enjoyed!**_


	2. Voldemort and his Death Eaters

_***PLEASE READ!* I know death eaters don't say Voldemort's name! WARNING: There's a lot of retarded romance! With all the evil people starring in this chapter, I can't help but make fun of them in this way! Question 5 also refers to "Hot N' Cold" by Katy Perry and to Barney.**_

Quiz Madness-Voldemort and His Death Eaters

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"That's Voldemort."

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"He's evil."

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"And i think he just said he wants a cookie..."

**Question 1:**

**Have you found love?**

_Snape: _I don't want to talk about it...

_Narcissa:_ I love Lucius.

_Lucius:_ And I love Narcissa.

_Voldemort: _How sweet. NOT! Hahaha,got you guys.

_Narcissa: _*Sniff*

**Question 2:**

**Do you want to find love?**

_Bellatrix:_ I have no time for love. I live to serve the Dark Lord.

_Voldemort: _That means a lot coming from you, Bellatrix.

_Yaxley: _The Dark Lord and Bellatrix, sittin' in a tree-

_Voldemort:_ Avada Kedavra.

_Bellatrix:_ So...what _**are**_ you doing tonight?

**Question 3:**

**Do you like pudding?**

_Peter: _Er_..._of course I do.

_Voldemort: _Really, Peter?...Do you like it more than _**me**_?

_Peter: _Uh...

_Voldemort: _*Growls*

**Question 4:**

**How does it feel to be included in fan fiction?**

_Lucius: _What is that?

_Voldemort: __**Honestly**_,Lucius,how could you _**not**_ know? *Whispers* Peter! Get me a dictionary!

**Question 5:**

**Will you sing for me?**

_Lucius:_ You're hot,then you're-

_Narcissa:_ Cold! You're yes,then you're no! You're-

_Peter:_ In,then you're out! You're up then you're-

_Voldemort:_ I LOVE YOU! YOU LOVE ME! WE'RE A HAPPY FAMILY! WITH A GREAT BIG HUG-

_Death Eaters:_ ......

**Question 6:**

**What possesion do you think Voldemort couldn't live without?**

_Bellatrix: _Me.

_Peter: _*Gasp* YOU SAID HIS NAME! *Faints*

_Avery: _*Snickers* His hair brush.

_Voldemort: _Oh no you just DIDN'T, FOOL!

**Question 7:**

**OMG! Did you hear that Nymphadora married Remus Lupin,the werewolf?**

_Bellatrix: _SHE IS THE DIRT ON THE BOTTOM OF MY SHINY BLACK SHOES!

_Narcissa: _Oh yeah, Bella, I was wondering if I could borrow those for tonight?

_Bellatrix:_ What will you give me in return?

_Narcissa:_How about my pink nail polish?

_Bellatrix:_ OKAY!

_Narcissa: _YAY!

_Peter:_ *Mutters* Girls...

**Question 8:**

**How are you doing today?**

_Voldemort: _...How am I doing?...How am I _**doing**_? I'm half _**dead**_, Harry Potter got away _**yet again**_, and my Death Eaters are _**morons**_! HOW DO YOU _**THINK**_ I'M DOING?!

_Lucius: _So...would you say this glass is half full or half empty? Just curious.

**Question 9:**

**What's you favorite food?**

_Lucius: _Potatoes.

_Yaxley: _....Pie....

_Bellatrix: _Chocolate cake.

_Voldemort:_ PONIES!!!!!!! MUAHAHAHA!

_Peter: _Now that's just evil...

**Question 10:**

**The quiz ends here,ok?**

_Snape: _I don't think I'll be able to bear it.


	3. Hogwarts Professors

_***PLEASE READ!* I might be using teachers that weren't at Hogwarts at the same time and only tought for a year. Question 3, of course, refers to The Mysterious Ticking Noise. Number 9 refers to I'm On A Boat.**_

Quiz Madness-Hogwarts Teachers

"I am Snape, the potions master."

"Er..."

**Question 1:**

**Do you like chocolate?**

_Snape: _Wow. What a great way to start a quiz. _Chocolate. _You're related to Lupin, aren't you?

_Lupin: _And what's that supposed to mean?

_McGonagall: _And of course Severus isn't reffering to your *cough**ADDICTION**cough*...

_Lupin: _I don't have an addiction!!! *Stuffs away Hershy wrappers*

_McGonagall: Riiiiiiiiiiiight_...

**Question 2:**

**Okay,we're going to see how much you know about the person next to you. Would they rather be...in a forest or at the beach?**

_McGonagall:_ Um...I think Severus would probably rather be in the forest.

_Snape: _Why?

_McGonagall: _Well...You're kind of bat-like,you know? Don't bats live in the forest?

_Lupin:_ Well _anyway_...I think Dumbledore would rather be at the beach.

_Dumbledore: _You're just imagining me in my bikini,huh?

_Everyone:_ ...

**Question 3:**

**Snape. Snape. Severus Snape?**

_Dumbldore: _DUMBLEDORE!

_Lupin: _Ron .Ron. Ron WEASLEY!

_Dumbledore:_ DUMBLEDORE!

_McGonagall: _Hermione...Hermione...Hermione. Hermione. Hermione.

_Dumbledore:_ DUMBLEDORE!

_Snape: __**HARRY POTTER! HARRY POTTER! OH! HARRY POTTER HARRY POTTER! YEAH! HARRY-**_

_McGonagall:_ Wow,Severus...We didn't know you were so...er...enthu-

_Snape:_ _**HARRY POTTER! HARRY POTTER! THAT'S ME!-**_

_McGonnagall: _Mmhm...Er, Severus-

_Snape:_ _**WHY DON'T I HAVE A COOL SCAR?!?!**_

_McGonnagall: _Well anyway...Who wants pie?

**Question 4:**

**What's your lucky number?**

_Snape: _I don't have a lucky number.

_Dumbledore: _I don't have a lucky number.

_McGonnagall: _I don't have a lucky number.

_Remus: _Well that was pointless.

**Question 5:**

**What's do you do in your free time?**

_Lupin: _Turn into a werewolf and try not to eat anybody...

_Snape: _Make potions to help Lupin not eat anybody.

_Trelawney: _Predict who Lupin will eat next.

_McGonagall: _Run from Lupin...

**Question 6:**

**What is your greatest fear?**

_Snape: _Being alone and without love for my whole life, having everybody hate me, then be killed by a giant snake.

_Sprout: _Yeah right. Like that would ever happen to anybody.

**Question 7:**

**What is your favorite thing about Hogwarts?**

_Trelawney: _All of the wonderful students.

_Snape: _You have _got_ to be kidding me.

_Trelawney: _Yeah...I lied. I like the free food.

**Question 8:**

**Do you have a best friend?**

_McGonnagall: _None of the professers really do... it's kind of sad...

_Snape: _Speak for yourself._ I _for one happen to have a best friend.

_McGonnagall: _For the last time, Severus, Lily is _dead. _

_Snape: _Oh cruel world...

**Question 9:**

**Who would you take if you won a boat ride for three?**

_Dumbledore: _I'd take Minerva and..................................Edward Cullen.

_Snape: _Awww.....

_Edward Cullen:_ *Yes*...

**Question 10:**

**Would you ever join the Death Eaters?**

_Dumbledore: _Sure, why not?

_Trelawney: _Well that was unexpected.

_Snape: _Okay, now i'm confused.

_McGonnagall: _Um......

_Dumbledore: _Heheh....Uh....Nevermind....


	4. The Trio

_***PLEASE READ!* I don't own Harry Potter. :'( Question 5 refers to three different songs… that I don't own. Hey, check me out on YouTube! Username is Froggyparty96 :D**_

Quiz Madness-The Trio

"Knock knock."

"Er...Who's there?"

"Interrupting Weasley."

"Interrupting Wea-"

"WEASLEY!"

**Question 1:**

**What do you think of school?**

_Ron: _Pretty boring... Lame teachers... Too much homework... Goofing off in class is fun though!

_Hermione:_ School is extremely beneficial, and I highly esteem the valuable skills we learn from our more than competent teachers.

_Ron: _Oh, um... That's what I meant to say.

**Question 2:**

**How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?**

_Harry: _Er… I dunno…. Six?

_Ron: _But what's the woodchuck's _name_?

_Hermione: _Seventy-four logs, precisely… And by the way_… _Ron, do you need medical attention?

**Question 3:**

**You see a huge (but harmless) spider. What do you do?**

_Harry: _Eh, it's not bothering me. Maybe squash it if I'm in the mood, or if Ron's in the room. (Hehe)

_Ron: _Throw a book at it and RUN—Er, I mean, stand up to it and be a _**man**__._ *Shivers*  
_Hermione:_ I can't believe you too! Killing a poor, innocent creature!

*A few years later…*

Harry and Ginny are happily married. However, Ron and Hermione's wedding has been postponed because Ron is having trouble getting over the fact that Hermione won't protect him from the big, bad spiders.

**Question 4:**

**What's your favorite spell?**

_Harry: __Expelliarmus__._

_Hermione: _Harry… We all kind of knew that… You're getting a little predictable… That could come back to haunt you one day…

_Harry: _Yeah, right. You're talking nonsense, Hermione.

**Question 5:**

**Let's dance?**

_Ron: _*Pops, locks, and drops it*

_Harry:_ *Dougies*

_Hermione:_ *Whips her hair*

_Harry and Ron:_ *Choke on Hermione's hair*

**Question 6:**

**What's your favorite form of exercise?**

_Harry: _Qudditch… Wait… Does that even count as exercise? I just kind of sit on the broom…

_Hermion_e: Studying…

_Ron: _Umm…

_Hermione: _Ron, Harry and I both saw those belly dancing videos your mom gave you last Christmas…

**Question 7:**

**Come on down! You're the next contestant on The Price Is Right!**

_Ron: _What the **** does that mean?

**Question 8:**

**You're ugly.**

_Hermione: _I know…

_Harry: _Hey, shut up!

_Ron: _Yeah right, I'm GORGEOUS.

_Harry:_ You have to admit, Ron's pretty hot.

_Ron:_ …

_Harry:_ Don't you agree, Hermione?

_Hermione:_ …

_Harry: _Guys, I'm not like that, I swear…

**Question 9:**

**Some people seem to think Harry and Hermione should get together… Your opinion of this, Ronald?**

_Ron: _*Growls…*

_Hermione:_ I know the question was directed at Ron (though I don't know why), but I'd like to say that Harry and I are just friends.

_Harry:_ Yeah, what Hermione said!

_Ron:_ *…Growls…*

**Question 10:**

**Okay, this is the last question for you guys! Then you'll probably never be featured in one of these interviews again. Isn't that sad?**

_Ron: _I dunno, I might be able to sneak back in once…

_Harry: _Hah, I'll be back in the Coolest People Ever chapter!

_Hermione:_ Oh, Harry…


End file.
